Our story., Random

Life as we know it!

Today in our house.

I know people are curious, as I would have been, to know how life goes on after the death of a son or daughter and particularly when suicide is involved.

Life in our house goes on as normal. Tonight as Tony came home from work, about 6pm as usual, the lads met him at the door to see what he brought home: sweets, biscuits or maybe a big kiss, sweets being preferable.

As he came in the door Lucy had her head down and started to cry…then panic stations, she had succeeded in putting lego up her nose! It took plenty of tears, sn*ts and about 10 minutes to retrieve the flippin thing. Phew!

I was at the time trying to get my head around an assignment on the defence of provocation in Ireland before college at seven, wondering what the flippin hell I’m doing in college when I haven’t a clue how to write a 3000 word essay!!! I’ll worry about that tomorrow.

 I was driving home, all pleased with myself, that I had managed, by some miracle to pass all my Christmas exams, listening to East Coast Radio, when a song came on (you just call out my name, and you know wherever I am, I’ll come running) had me in floods…could be any song really! 

I don’t know whether it’s an Irish superstition that usually these things happen in 3’s? While I was in college, Jack almost blew up the microwave trying to melt the chocolate spread, with the foil bits still attached to the edge, and then the shower blew up when Tony was in it. (wish I was there, I’d say that was hilarious)

It was all pretty funny; but does superstition not state it’s supposed to happen in 3’s? So should we not have some dispensation as we will always have the first one…Shane’s still dead. Sorry for putting a dampener on this, it was a pretty funny evening but japers, how can life be normal?

10 thoughts on “Life as we know it!”

  1. I cannot begin to imagine what it must feel like to lose a child. I struggled when my eldest lad was out in Afghanistan. The threat of death being enough to keep me awake at night. There’s a few people I will be leaning on when sadness hits me, yourself and Tony are included on that list.

    As for writing an essay, you CAN do it. You’ve wrote enough words on this blog for a couple of novels so 3,000 words will be a breeze.

    PS – I am also laughing at the shower incident


  2. That’s just it, isn’t it. Everything seems like another ordinary day…and then bam, oh yea, bam bam bam….except for that gaping hole that doesn’t close. I go through this a lot. This is the new normal. Love and Peace xx


  3. I agree with Bob, you can do an essay (length no issue), you write beautifully, express yourself and clearly so.

    There is the traumatic pain you have indeed had inflicted upon you, that i know nothing about, i cannot say how life should be, could be etc.
    Nobody knows anything about anyones personal inner sufferings, yet we all still atempt to compare that, as if to somehow understand, even aim to define as reason.

    Thats where human nature and psychiatry both screw up.
    Its not about reason so much as it is anyones right to define levels of and time length of suffering.

    We all need understand the pain and heartache is there and do what we can to make that the way forward.
    You do this in the most apt of ways.
    You chose to demand answers for wrongdoings, you are not sitting back believing all was for nothing.
    You are very much a voice for the many and with a dignified attitude for justice.

    I for one am impressed by the continued voicing you have about the irish pharmaceutical situation.
    Im in England myself but to me, the pharmas are everywhere and everywhere there needs a Leonie or two to speak up.

    Life? Normality? I cannot recall normality i was robbed of, but i guess i was robbed of it for a reason to which has for the past two years had me preventing medicinal mistakes, ssris/vaccines etc to all those who will listen.

    If anything, i believe, we are to suffer for reasons, not a man made ‘Religious God given reason’ but a reason for that of the big picture our human brains in physical cannot yet begin to imagine.

    Youve done what many cannot, made the suffering into a strength, positive, via a stand up and fight for justice, that to me says, you are the person you are meant to be. (not all saints are globally known by name and religious deciding, most, are those who go all out for the rights this world was created with, freedom, selflessness and means to an end of mans greeds and non compassion.
    If life had no bigger picture? We’d all be corrupt and care nothing of it,
    deep i know, sorry.
    I’ll end light tho, the lego made me giggle alot, i got lego stuck up my nose once lol. The microwave story reminds me of my drying paper incident where it burst into flames and (being an adult too) a friends kid saying, “course that would happen” like how dumb am i? Lol.
    All in all Leonie, you are normal, you are a stronger than you know person for all the right reasons life can grasp you for. Much love to you and family.


    1. Thanks D for the lovely words of encouragement. It certainly made me laugh being compared to a saint…that’s a first and last!!! I am no saint.
      As for the Lego…what is it with everyone sticking Lego where they shouldn’t? Seems that most people have done it. Have heard lots of Lego stories this week. You say you cannot recall normality…you sound like you have your head screwed on and besides, who wants to be normal?
      Keep up the good work,


      1. Thank you lol, ive an intelligence but my ‘characteristics’ aint that of the what they used to be.
        Ive no doubt anyone on these drugs for a length of time (me 11yrs) are the person they once were, as you know yourself, pHARMa, wont admit such things as ‘damaging’ thus rendering such truths ‘non scientific evidented’. (despite the hundreds of thousands of us being blatant 1st hand truth).
        Blah grrrrr etc etc.
        Anyhow, ur welcome and dont underestimate your credentials hon, unsung heros keep the Governments and Elites like pHARMa from the silence they aim to keep, taking over our lives completely.


  4. Liveline Podcast – whistleblowers and patient advocates 20 January 2012 12:00
    Patsy, John and Alan all spoke out on behalf of patients but found it got them into trouble with the powers-that-be http://www.rte.ie/radio1/podcast/podcast_liveline.xml

    Liveline Podcast – whistleblower punished 19 January 2012 12:00
    Louise Bayliss feels she was punished for being a whistleblower about the situation in St Brendan’s Hospital, Grangegorman http://www.rte.ie/radio1/podcast/podcast_liveline.xml


  5. Hi Bill,
    Unbelievable isn’t it? I followed Louise’s story in the last few weeks on liveline but hadn’t heard the other one. I listened to it last night and it’s just a disgrace. The people who made that decision, that these people be sacked (for doing their job properly), should be sacked themselves and these workers reinstated. Their decision makes a mockery of their “patient advocate” job title; it doesn’t bode well for the next advocate to speak out.
    The HSE seem to be running around like headless chickens and when questioned, their best form of defence is attack. Too many CEO’s protecting their fat wage checks and not doing the job that the Government is paying them to do. The Government needs to make a decision and quick before this crisis turns into another FAS fiasco.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s